Nick sat on the floor of his hotel room, sobbing into his knees for what seemed like hours until he heard Kevin come into the room.
“Nick’s not here…” Nick whimpered softly, trying to stuff himself under the bed and failing. His tall frame prevented him from fitting underneath.
“I can see you, ya know.” Kevin said, leaning over him and laughing. Nick blushed and Kevin helped him up.
“Brian threw me out of the group.” he said after a few minutes, embarrassed with himself.
“I know he did……but there is not much you can do to change that. His mind is made up, kiddo.” Kevin told him. Nick smiled, he felt so relieved to have him there….and even though he had screwed up….Kevin was there for him.
“Can I ask you something?” he wondered as Kevin sat down on the bed.
“Why did you leave?” Nick asked. Kevin looked away from him, thinking.
“Please tell me. I want to know….I had no idea about Leighanne….I would never do that to Brian and I am a horrible person if I did do what she said I did.” Nick rambled. Kevin smiled at him then….it was the saddest smile he had ever seen.
“You really don’t know, do you?” Kevin replied suddenly, looking at the blonde with interest. Nick simply shook his head.
“It was during the Never Gone tour….you were late for soundcheck and I found you with Kristin on my bus.”
“My wife.” Kevin said softly before adding…
“What happened?” Nick asked, looking at Kevin with concern. His heart sank as he saw tears in his green eyes.
“I saw you having sex with her. You were so wrapped up in yourself, Nick. You didn’t care about any of our feelings…..the fans meant nothing. You drank….did drugs, did whatever you wanted. I tried to be civil but we were always at each other’s throats. You said I treated you like a child.” Kevin explained with a sigh. Nick was ashamed. He was a rotten person and nobody liked him.
“I am so sorry, Kev. I had no idea.”
“I guess being sober makes you think, doesn’t it?” Kevin said with a half-hearted smile. He nudged Nick’s shoulder and they laughed.
“Kevin…..do you ever wish you could turn back time….and change something that happened to you?” Nick asked.
“All the time, Nick.”
“I wish I hadn’t broken up with Kristin so quickly…..that I didn’t leave the group.” Kevin said. Nick smiled slightly.
“You can still come back.” he said. Nick wanted so badly to tell him what happened and make things right but he knew he had screwed up big time.
“They don’t want me back. You told me so yourself when I saw you last.” Kevin replied with a sigh as he remembered….
“Nick….please listen to me…I want what’s best for you, best for all of us.” Kevin said as he watched Nick empty the bottle of Jack Daniels.
“What’s best for me?! You don’t know anything about me!” the 22 year old shouted, throwing the bottle at him and reaching for another.
“Just sit down and talk to me.” Kevin said softly, reaching for his arm.
“I’m fucking done.” Nick snapped, pulling away. Kevin shook his head as Nick opened another bottle.
“You don’t mean that….it’s the alcohol talking. We are all worried about you…stop hurting yourself before it’s too late!” he begged. Nick looked angrily at him, hate in his eyes.
“That’s bullshit! You’re not my father! I am not a child! Get the fuck out of my room….”
“Nick…..you need help..”
“Go fuck yourself Kevin! Fuck you and the group. I’m done!” Nick shouted, throwing the second bottle. Kevin ducked as it nearly hit him in the head….shards of broken glass flying. Nick walked over and took a swing at him…then hell broke loose…
Kevin opened his eyes to see Nick sitting next to him with tears streaming down his face. Nick was healthy and sober now….but the pain from that night lingered.
“I am so sorry, Nick….I wanted to help you….you were going to a bad place…” Kevin said softly.
“I think you were….I never want to lose you again. I am so sorry if I did all of that.” Nick replied, hugging him tight and not wanting to let him go.