“First, just analyze the situation. Don’t just barrel in there without thinking.” – Phil (Hercules)
After my run in with Howie, things were pretty smooth after that. Brian and I were like two peas in a pod, I was passing my exams and so was he. Life was good.
However for me there was one thing missing.
I’d never been on a date.
Brian always talked about these old girlfriends he’d dated back home and I was slightly jealous. When he’d ask me to tell my girlfriend stories, I would make something up or change the topic. Not to mention some of my classmates thought I was gay and Brian was my boyfriend…by the way I talked about him. Brian said this, and Brian said that. I mean, not that he isn’t appealing and all….but I prefer women. I swear.
It was then that it hit me, I’d never really been with one….ya know, in the sense of being with someone. Brian told me he had slept with Howie’s girl and I just kept thinking he’s some expert on girls, and I hadn’t learned his secrets yet.
I wish there was a class on this girl crap.
So as I’m here having these thoughts during class, I realize I’m hungry. We got let out and I headed for a vending machine, looking for something to tide me over in between. There was a hot girl there, preventing me from satisfying my craving for Twinkies.
“Hi,” she said. I looked up and just smiled at her.
Instead of impressing her, I managed to trip and almost land into the machine. She giggled and helped me up. Her hair was red and she had blue eyes, like Ariel. I grinned but ended up blushing.
“You’re funny.” she said. I laughed awkwardly, rubbing the back of my head. Funny was girl code for ‘you’re a idiot’.
“Um, thanks…..I guess.” I blushed.
“I was trying to get that pack of Twinkies, it got stuck.” she said. I looked at the machine and was faced with a really tough decision. It was either impress her and let her have them, or act like I couldn’t reach them, then grab them and eat them myself.
Choosing food over women is not fair, I thought as my stomach growled.
“Let me help you.” I said.
No, Nick. You want to eat. What are you doing? There’s plenty of other vending machines on campus…….but I look at her again. I stuck my arm in as far as I could….and the Twinkies managed to slide out. However….my arm wouldn’t follow suit.
“Are you okay? Should I get help?” she asked sweetly. I struggled.
“Um….no…” I said, trying to sound manly and failing miserably. I started to panic a little and my arm was throbbing at this point.
“Let me see if I can pull you out.” she said. She wrapped her arms around my waist and for a second it seemed like we were the only ones there. We pulled together and I finally broke free, falling backwards.
“Thanks.” I smiled, rubbing my arm. She looked me over and smiled back.
“My name is Crystal. Will you be okay….uh…..” she said, and I realized I hadn’t told her my name.
“Oh….Um…..Nick….my name’s Nick. I think.”
“You think?” she chuckled.
I blushed again. I was a mess in front of hot girls.
“Nice to meet you.” she replied with a small giggle. I held up the Twinkie bag and she blushed a little.
“Want half?” I offered. Now I was even surprised with myself, I never shared food with anyone….ever. I gave her half of it and we walked together, eating and talking. We talked about lots of things, she wanted to be a nurse. We had some things in common, she was from Orlando too.
“Well, Nick….we walked halfway through this building and you haven’t asked me out yet. I’m impressed.”
“I just met you.” I said flatly.
“Okay, then I will save you the trouble. Would you like to go out tomorrow? I like you.” she asked. I was stunned, I’d never been asked out before.
“Sure. Where should I pick you up?”
“Brian!!!!!” I shouted, running into the dorm a few hours later. He was napping so I pulled his covers off and he woke up.
“BrianImetahotgirlthatlookslikeArielandIneedyourhelp!” I said without stopping to breathe. He sat up, looking at me in confusion.
“I met this girl today…”
When I was done telling him, he started laughing.
“You got your arm stuck in a vending machine and got a date out of it? Clearly we need to work on your technique on picking up girls.”
“Briaaaaaaan…..I’m being serious. I’ve never been on a real date in my life. I don’t know anything about girls.” I whined. I gave him the pout and he rolled his eyes at me.
“Save it, Nick. So all those dates you told me about weren’t true? Even the one about having sex in Kevin’s pickup truck?” he asked.
“Um….let’s not tell Kevin about that one. That was the night I lost my virginity. It wasn’t a date. She was a friend of mine and we agreed to have sex so neither of us went to college a virgin.” I confessed. I did regret doing that because I never did hear from her again. I don’t remember her name, it started with a K.
“Okay, well I don’t know how I can be of help. You kinda need to figure this stuff out on your own.” Brian said.
Well fuck a duck. How was I going to handle this one? I was hopeful but extremely nervous about seeing Crystal, especially after making an idiot of myself…I wasn’t expecting anything to come of the date, but hey. Stranger things have happened.
I would have to just wait and see.