*taken from Tales From The Fake BSB Cruise at AC*
So there I was, in the middle of a wonderful time with my Nick when Jen and Lenni came running into my tiki hut. For real, I was mad.
“GRAB HER! SHE’S A STOWAWAY!” Cap’n Jen shouted. Lenni jabbed me with one of her pointy sticks and mumbled something about Brians and Hannah….I didn’t quite catch what she said. Anyways, they dragged me off despite my pleas.
“You thought we wouldn’t notice you hiding out here, did you Tracy? Cap’n Jen knows all. I don’t appreciate party crashers here.” Jen said as Lenni and Rachel tied me to the ship mast sticking out of the ground near the stage….where a bunch of Nicks were about to put on a show. So I had front row to a concert….but I was mad that my sexy time with 2009 People Magazine Han Solo Nick was interrupted. Boo. Cap’n Jen is a Nick Nazi. Seriously.
“No Nick for you. You are going on the real cruise….you aren’t one of us.” Cap’n Jen snapped, wagging a finger at me as she scolded me. Well fuck, how was I supposed to know I wasn’t welcome? Nobody had told me I wasn’t invited, damn it. I just scowled at her and she eventually walked away, leaving me where I was. The ropes were tight and I couldn’t move, my arms were behind me. I saw my Nick wandering around, looking confused. Jen was sneaking off with a Nick that looked like he was right out of the I Still video. Not that I was complaing, I loved watching that fine ass walk away. Lenni was on a search for Hannah, who had taken off with all the Brians to some airplane. This was my chance to escape, but I couldn’t move. I had to think fast.
“Help me, Nick!”
“Tracy!” he shouted from across the lot. The Nick from the Help Me video came over instead.
“Not you.” I snapped and he walked away looking disappointed. Wait maybe I could have them both? Ok, focus girl….don’t get greedy. Although that could be fun….two Nicks at one time? LORD.
“Help me Nick Carter, you’re my only hope!” I shouted. My Nick ran across the lot, knocking girls down as he tried to get to me. All of a sudden The Call Kevin was standing in front of me.
“Out of my way.” Nick said bravely. Kevin took out a plastic red lightsaber. He kind of looked like Darth Vader just then, with the long black coat and black clothes.Nick held his own lightsaber, a green one…and they started to fight, hitting each other and making lightsaber noises. I was amused as hell.
“You can’t take her, she is a prisoner. She doesn’t belong here.” Kevin said as they struggled.
“Neither do you,” Nick shouted. They fought until Nick finally threw the lightsaber aside.
“Fuck it.” He leapt on Kevin and tackled him. When he got up, I saw he had split his pants but didn’t say anything….would any of you tell Nick Carter that he needs to cover himself? Hell fucking no. Blasphemy. He doesn’t need clothes. So Nick finally came over and untied me.
“Finally we can finish what we started……what Hannah called Ewok and Wookiee time?” I said, waggling my eyebrows seductively and giggling. “I got a better idea….” he said with a smirk. Now what could he possibly be up to?
“Where are you going?” I asked him, watching him. He just winked and smirked at me again….and I couldn’t help but think that I am going to like this idea very much……